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October 06, 2009


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4 months was rough. The kid's room used to be the guestroom so there's a futon in there, and between 4 and 5.5 months I basically slept there most nights either because I had just nursed the boo back to sleep but wasn't sure whether he was going to wake again in 30 mins (hence not worth me getting back into my own bed) or because the boo was actually sleeping next to me. we co-slept on that futon about 2-3 nights per week just because it was easier (my husband had our whole bed to himself...don't say i wasn't jealous). but after that we sleep-trained (at around 6 months) and it only took 2 nights. and then at 7.5 months we night-weaned and it also only took 2-3 nights. we have subsequently had to sleep-train again, after a long vacation of sleeping in the same room as the boo which meant he was co-sleeping _and_ night nursing (at 10.5 months!). i agree with bella about how they don't really regress back to good sleep patterns, but move forward into whatever new patterns/habits/developments are going on and so you kind of have to plan your strategies according to what's going on now (as opposed to what used to be the case).


My kid and yours are twins! Mine too slept 7 hour stretches at 2 weeks and at 6 weeks began to sleep 12 hour nights. This went on until she was 16 months old and then wham, she started waking every 40 minutes ( till round midnight and then once or twice depending on the night afterwards) She was a tiny-tot though ( 3rd %) and definitely needed the feed, at least the ones in the heart of the night. I was devestated to see this change in her sleep. I so hoped she would go back to sleeping well but we ended up resorting to sleep traiing her at 7 months which improved all aspects of sleep for her, including naps. In our case the sleep training wore off at around 18 months and then the s..t hit the fan as they say. She has been a poor sleeper since then. Now at 33 months she wakes at least 5 times a night ( but does fall asleep immediately) and there is nothing we can do about it (sob sob). Hope you have more luck than we did with our 'excellent' sleeper.


Sorry, that should be 16 WEEKS old. I wish!!


Oh Geez, I hope I have better luck with my early good sleeper too! I am still swaddling my son as well, but he will probably need to stop that soon, as he is getting so big. I'm a little worried about how that will affect his sleep. Right now, if its a good night he gets up 2-3 times. On a bad night it could be as much as 6-7 (!!) times a night. CRAZY-MAKING! Uggggh.

My daughter woke up every 2-3 hours from birth until about 12 months, at which point she randomly slept through the night on her own, without me doing any sleep training. She is 2.5 now and still sleeps through the night, no prob. I think I lucked out with that! Although...she did give me a hard time in that first year! I know I won't tolerate that much waking for that long with my son... Having already gone through it, and knowing how much it sucks to be so sleep deprived, I CANNOT do it again!

Oh--and thanks so much Isabela, for posting my question! I will definitely wait to sleep train. 6 months sounds like a good time. I know I can make it to 6 months. I am still kind of hoping that things will go back to the way they were when he was younger, but I doubt it! I'm not setting myself up for disappointment.

Last night was actually a little bit better. In bed at 8 pm, up at 1:30, 3:30 and 6 am. Then up for the day at 7 am. He fed each time he woke up. That is tolerable, but probably a fluke.

Can anyone comment of the nap patterns of there 4-ish month olds? My son has a morning nap (usually between 9 and 10) but after that, there isn't a whole lot of rhyme or reason to his napping.


When my daughter's nightime sleep went skewiff, so did the napping. I would say it is related. She also made it down for the morning nap ( slept an hour say), and if I was lucky, got another 40 minutes in the afternoon. Sometimes if I was really lucky, I'd catch her just as she was waking after 40 minutes, bf her and she'd sleep another 40. Good luck

@Sarah...same here with my little guy, not much rhyme or reason beyond taking a first nap around 9. just when i think that he'll fall asleep in the carseat he won't, then falls asleep in the stroller, and won't again...and he's nursing so much right now which is fine with me, but like you mentioned, I've already gone through the 'bad sleeper' gig with his older sister, and i'm not too interested in revisiting those long nights and sad days of being exhausted and confused!

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Hi, I'm Isabel

  • I'm a developmental psychologist and mom to two awesome 3-year-old boys. My area of expertise is social and emotional development and most of my research is on interventions that help make families and friendships healthier for children. More about me...


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    Ask us any question about your child, child development in general, or parenting. We'll try to post your question as soon as possible, with our take on the answer. We both have our PhDs in developmental psychology, so our "take" will usually be informed by our own and our colleagues' research, as well as developmental theory that spans several decades. And of course we'll throw in some thoughts that come from our own personal sample size of 3.

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